Thursday, April 29, 2010

Moofies - Ritual (2001)

EXPECTATIONS: The DVD case foe Ritual seems like it's trying it's hardest to look boring. This a Tales from the Crypt remake of I Walked With A Zombie, but the Crypt Keeper is only a tiny picture on the cover of the DVD, and they called the film 'Ritual'. I have a bad feeling that this will be completely dull, instead of the super campy horror fun that it could be.

REALITY: Totally dull. There are a heap of "stars" in this film which almost fooled me into thinking it might be fun. Tim Curry plays a seedy pervy vet, Craig "Uncle Kieth" Sheffer plays a rich white man, and Erick "Kasuf" Avari plays a doctor who in an early scene dies a super gory death in an early scene. The entire gore quota must have been spent in this one scene because the rest of the film drags along with very little happening whatsoever, other than the camera ogling at the super tight nipple top of Jennifer Grey.

This feels like a dull episode of the Crypt Keeper television series that's been dragged out to movie length because it was shot in Jamaica. It's not bad. It's just boring.


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